Coffee Table Declarations
Sunday, October 23, 2005
Looks like Sunday night is my writing night around here. I know I've been really neglecting my writing lately. It's tough because work has become so busy, I can barely steal a minute to read a blog or two. Oh well, excuses excuses.
And speaking of excuses, I'm just beating off the guys with a stick right now. Just before logging into blogger I checked my email and there was one from a guy I met recently while volunteering. He asked me if I want to grab coffee sometime or something, he said he wanted to get to know me better. Trouble is, while I thought he was nice, there is just no attraction there on my part. I didn't give him my email - he got it from the volunteer list because he's one of the coordinators. So how do I respond to that?
When word gets out that you're single again suddenly everyone knows a lonely guy they think you should meet. Within the past couple weeks two coworkers approached me about guys (one a best friend's brother, and the other's brother-in-law). The brother-in-law sent me an email asking me if I want to grab coffee sometime (are you detecting a theme here??) But it's hard to be excited when my coworker described him by saying, "I'm going to be honest, he's not the best looking guy" and that he's kept asking her, "don't you work with any single girls?"
Late last Friday night one would-be suitor actually had the courage to ask me in person if I want to "have dinner sometime". Of course, I'm not interested in him either. He is a coworker who I thought was just friendly and I'd been friendly back. Guess he got the wrong idea, or his hopes up anyway. He was a little easier to turn down because I just told him I was interested in someone else, which is true. I am pursuing other interests right now. But it seems like a lame excuse to use over email with guys I barely know. What's a girl to do? I know it sounds silly, but that is one tricky thing I've never found easy - how to politely decline and yet still be friendly, without sending mixed messages? I have to give the coworker a lot of credit because all week he was as normal and friendly as ever, as if there had never been an awkward invitation outside of a local bar.
And speaking of coworkers and invitations, I know you've all been waiting to hear how my lunch went. I don't want to disappoint, but it was rather anti-climactic. We talked, we ate, we walked back. He was super polite and he paid for my lunch, but really, he'd have to come right out and make some sort of serious declaration for me to understand he's interested. Partly I think he might be, but partly I'm just not sure. There has been no follow up or future invitations since but I am going to be patient.
The thing about putting yourself out there in a situation that isn't just a "safe" guy is, if he's not interested, I can't rationalize it any other way than "it must be me". Safe guys are safe because they have other reasons for not getting involved. But I think he's worth the risk so we'll see what happens.
And speaking of excuses, I'm just beating off the guys with a stick right now. Just before logging into blogger I checked my email and there was one from a guy I met recently while volunteering. He asked me if I want to grab coffee sometime or something, he said he wanted to get to know me better. Trouble is, while I thought he was nice, there is just no attraction there on my part. I didn't give him my email - he got it from the volunteer list because he's one of the coordinators. So how do I respond to that?
When word gets out that you're single again suddenly everyone knows a lonely guy they think you should meet. Within the past couple weeks two coworkers approached me about guys (one a best friend's brother, and the other's brother-in-law). The brother-in-law sent me an email asking me if I want to grab coffee sometime (are you detecting a theme here??) But it's hard to be excited when my coworker described him by saying, "I'm going to be honest, he's not the best looking guy" and that he's kept asking her, "don't you work with any single girls?"
Late last Friday night one would-be suitor actually had the courage to ask me in person if I want to "have dinner sometime". Of course, I'm not interested in him either. He is a coworker who I thought was just friendly and I'd been friendly back. Guess he got the wrong idea, or his hopes up anyway. He was a little easier to turn down because I just told him I was interested in someone else, which is true. I am pursuing other interests right now. But it seems like a lame excuse to use over email with guys I barely know. What's a girl to do? I know it sounds silly, but that is one tricky thing I've never found easy - how to politely decline and yet still be friendly, without sending mixed messages? I have to give the coworker a lot of credit because all week he was as normal and friendly as ever, as if there had never been an awkward invitation outside of a local bar.
And speaking of coworkers and invitations, I know you've all been waiting to hear how my lunch went. I don't want to disappoint, but it was rather anti-climactic. We talked, we ate, we walked back. He was super polite and he paid for my lunch, but really, he'd have to come right out and make some sort of serious declaration for me to understand he's interested. Partly I think he might be, but partly I'm just not sure. There has been no follow up or future invitations since but I am going to be patient.
The thing about putting yourself out there in a situation that isn't just a "safe" guy is, if he's not interested, I can't rationalize it any other way than "it must be me". Safe guys are safe because they have other reasons for not getting involved. But I think he's worth the risk so we'll see what happens.
