Coffee Table Declarations
Monday, December 13, 2004
I have a confession to make: I'm secretly a slob. O.K., this may not be a secret to some who have seen my bedroom which looks like a tornado sped through it leaving a trail of clothing casualties on every square inch of the floor, but the realization just recently dawned on me. Saturday my roommate left for a week in California and since then my apartment has fallen into a state of disrepair. As I sit here typing this from work I can clearly envision the chaos that is waiting for me - there are dishes in the sink, something stinky in the fridge, an empty pizza box and various junk mail on the counter.
Yesterday when I was emptying grocery bags I discovered that a package of seaweed salad had opened and there was seaweed all over the place. What did I do? I wasn't going to throw out the yummy seaweed salad I had been so excited to find at my healthy grocery store. I pulled clumps of the slimey stuff out of the bag with my bare hands and shoved it back into the package. Needless to say several strands of seaweed ended up on the counter or the floor and are still sitting there at this very moment. Isn't that gross? How about the pizza crust on a plate that is right now at this very moment sitting on the coffee table in my living room and has been since yesterday's lunch?
What is my problem? I don't like living like this. I don't really enjoy looking at stray seaweed plastered to the counter as I pass through the kitchen, or smelling something unappetizing every time I open the fridge. I'd like to say I just get lazy sometimes when no one else is around to notice but that doesn't seem accurate either. It feels more like a personal expression of some sort - a statement that says "hey, this is my place and if I want to have seaweed on the floor well then I am going to have seaweed on the floor." The scary part is, this slobbiness manifests itself almost immediately when a roommate happens to be away. I've done it before. I always clean up meticulously before their return, but there's just something freeing about knowing that no one else is around to be disgusted by a mess. Is that crazy? I mean, it's not like I'm purposely trashing the place or anything. I'm not taking handfuls of seaweed and gleefully flinging them at the walls. But it's nice to know that I could.
Yesterday when I was emptying grocery bags I discovered that a package of seaweed salad had opened and there was seaweed all over the place. What did I do? I wasn't going to throw out the yummy seaweed salad I had been so excited to find at my healthy grocery store. I pulled clumps of the slimey stuff out of the bag with my bare hands and shoved it back into the package. Needless to say several strands of seaweed ended up on the counter or the floor and are still sitting there at this very moment. Isn't that gross? How about the pizza crust on a plate that is right now at this very moment sitting on the coffee table in my living room and has been since yesterday's lunch?
What is my problem? I don't like living like this. I don't really enjoy looking at stray seaweed plastered to the counter as I pass through the kitchen, or smelling something unappetizing every time I open the fridge. I'd like to say I just get lazy sometimes when no one else is around to notice but that doesn't seem accurate either. It feels more like a personal expression of some sort - a statement that says "hey, this is my place and if I want to have seaweed on the floor well then I am going to have seaweed on the floor." The scary part is, this slobbiness manifests itself almost immediately when a roommate happens to be away. I've done it before. I always clean up meticulously before their return, but there's just something freeing about knowing that no one else is around to be disgusted by a mess. Is that crazy? I mean, it's not like I'm purposely trashing the place or anything. I'm not taking handfuls of seaweed and gleefully flinging them at the walls. But it's nice to know that I could.
