I have noticed a recent disturbing trend in lawn ornamentation. First it was gigantic scary/cuddly characters on Halloween. Now it's festive/cuddly characters. One house in particular which I drive by to and from work, has a lawn full of giant inflatable white dogs wearing scarves and hats and lit up at night. I'm not quite sure what the point is of such in-your-face decoration. I'd be scared the damn thing would short circuit and light my house on fire. I mean really, is it supposed to discourage intruders or something? Are they going to believe a smiling, glowing, 10 foot tall canine is real? Maybe. But if you ask me, I'd say it would encourage criminal activity instead. I'm surprised that some local hoodlums haven't toilet papered or punctured these massive symbols of winter joy.

Scarier still, is the house with the freaky looking Santa standing on the stoop. He is not your traditional jolly old friend, he is more of an old fashioned version... thinner, longer hair, beard, and robe, face less jolly. Much, much less jolly. Why don't people just stick with lights? Not those trees made of tube lighting or those inanimate illuminated deer, just some nice colored lights.

I remember an actual family activity of my youth was Driving-Around-To-Look-At-Christmas-Lights. We also had a little game of trying to find a house that still had Christmas lights in like, August. In all honesty, I think we found one in March but I'm not sure if they were still up after that or not.

Then in college, Christmas lights became THE thing to hang from your ceiling year round. I spent three hours adhering them to my ceiling freshman year, only to have to take them down because they were deemed a fire hazard. I still don't quite understand that. Were the lights going to set a fire? Or were they going to fall from the ceiling and trip people who were running from the blaze? Actually, that would be pretty scary. But not as scary as that Santa on the stoop - he gives me the willies.  ¶ 5:06 PM