I am so sick. I feel like there has been a hostile takeover of my face. I'm sneezing and red and puffy and my throat hurts and I can't breathe out of my nose. There is nothing worse than being sick and being at work, as I am now. I left early yesterday afternoon on totally unrelated business, and therefore I felt I just couldn't leave today. So here I sit, miserable and counting the minutes until I can go home.

I was fine yesterday, and then I woke up in the middle of the night like this and have been this way ever since. I hate being sick at work because everyone knows and if you don't say something to them right off like, "I'm sick." they say things like "are you o.k.? you don't look so good." or the all time favorite, "you look terrible." Um... thanks! Plus, I just sneezed about 28 times in a row. That's the worst feeling because once you get started you just can't stop.

When I was quite young and impressionable, I used to read the Guinness Book of World Records which my parents had for some reason. I think the world record for longest amount of time spent sneezing is like, 32 years or something. I just can't imagine. I also know all about long curly fingernails and conjoined twins, and all sorts of fun trivia. In other words, I can take heart in the fact that while I feel awful right now, at least I don't have a 76 pound tumor containing teeth and hair growing in my stomach region. At least, I don't think I do.

Finally, I would just like to share something funny that David Letterman (or maybe it was Jay Leno) said last night. It's a crazy world we live in when one day you're the leader of Iraq and the next you're being checked for fleas on Fox News.  ¶ 5:07 PM